Wednesday, August 13, 2014


Now, usually, when you want to tell a story, you start at the beginning and go until you're done. For the past few weeks, I've been trying. That's not going well. There's a lot to say but I don't even know where to start. Instead, I guess I'll just jump in where we are so I can get something posted and get back into the online world.

Hi. How are you all? I've missed you this summer.

It's 8pm on a school night. I would like to say that things are going wonderfully and we are happy to have our school year routines back... but, no. The Goofy One is screaming and crying that he has no TV. Walter is stalking me, I haven't found out yet what he wants. Alex is stimming at his door because Goofy won't be quiet, and I am sitting on my "new bed" waiting for it to calm down while I talk to you.

Over the summer, I spent my nights in the Goofy One's room, trying to remember not to hit my head on top bunk when my alarm went off. As August got going and the First Day of School date got closer, I realized I had an even bigger problem- sleep issues. The Goofy One never sleeps. Well, it seems that way, anyway. I can't tell you how many 3-5AMs I've seen. To help him sleep, he has dark curtains over his windows (not that it really works, but a woman needs hope). I have the opposite problem, I can't ever wake up. And that's when I moved to the couch. I think I like it here. The Goofy One, on the other hand, is not so pleased. As we speak, he's screaming that he doesn't like his room anymore, he wants the other couch. I'm pretty sure his entire plan is to never let me sleep again so I say hell no. I'm ignoring his pitiful cries.

I've been spending a lot of time with Alex's step-mom and sister this summer, and so has Goofy. He's learned to beg for toys on every trip to the store, he's learned whining without words, and he's learned to scream really loud when someone makes him mad. We've had a very productive summer, you see, and now it's time for school to start.

I've been talking to people over the past week or two. Trying to get things settled with the kids and find out what the hell I'm supposed to be doing. Informing people on my boys' complete lack of progress due to being practically motherless these past several months. Did I mention I got a job? Lord of the Flies doesn't even begin to cover it. To be fair, Alex wasn't my fault. He broke his finger. That cut out all of his self care goals. But, he's rocking communication! Anyway, so the Goofy One, his occupational therapist sent me a very sweet message inviting me to let her know if I've found anything sensory-wise that worked over the summer or to let her know the places we've struggled. That's going to be fun.

When the pediatrician read Goofy's evaluation results last year, he was like, "his medication isn't working." and I was like, "yes it is. They said he's great in school." and then summer started, and I'm messaging the pediatrician, "his meds are not working at all. FIX. IT." and the pediatrician gave us new ones, and I was like, "whew. so much better." and two weeks later, we're looking at Adderall  because there's no way I'm setting this demon loose on unsuspecting teachers.

As far as his behavior goes... I'm just trying to keep the kid contained and the house standing. That's serious. Yesterday morning, he woke me up at 5am. Fine, you know? I yell at him to go back to his room. He can stay awake, I don't care, just do it quietly somewhere else. He runs off, the front door opens and closes, I jump up, the back door opens and closes, I go yell at him that he is not ever allowed to be outside while people are sleeping and take him to his room to watch TV (Bless Alex for being a good sleeper) while I try to wake up. I step out front to smoke, his effing window is wide open! I'm thinking we might need something a little stronger than Melatonin. and Xanax for mama.

I just don't know. I'm at a loss here. We have a team meeting tentatively scheduled for next Thursday. I have no clue what I'm going to tell them.

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