Friday, March 28, 2014

Reminiscing... Change can be a good thing.

I have absolutely nothing to talk about and I'm loving it. I would like to keep it that way for a bit, but I know next week starts a whole bunch of stuff. Autism Awareness Month, Autism Awareness Day, A Day of Remembrance, meetings for Alex's sister and Goofy, PTA meetings (Thank God, I'm looking forward to that one.) and I don't even know... but that's next week. Today, I have nothing.

I've been thinking a lot lately. Remembering. Time flies, doesn't it? Time flies and things change.

My Goofy One is as wild as they come. Even on medication, the boy is a force to be reckoned with. Walking anywhere with him is dangerous. He's so busy observing things or spinning in circles that he doesn't watch where he's going. He runs into things, runs into people, and wanders off. There's never a plan, he just goes with the flow, follows the focus of his attention from thing to thing or person to person. Thursday evening, we had an Occupational Therapy appointment. OT is a big deal for him and he is paranoid about being late. Our first day in the waiting room, there was a boy there with us, after quite a long time, the OT came out to call Goofy and saw the boy. The boy had been late for his appointment so he missed his therapy time- she could not see him that day because she had an appointment with Goofy. This made an impact. We can never be late. So, we get there early enough that we don't have to rush, we're just moseying along from the car to the door when it hits me- the Goofy Child is walking beside me. He's not spinning, not dawdling, not bolting, I don't even have a hand on him. We are walking nicely, side by side from the car to the building. I'm shocked at this realization, when did that happen? When did he start walking nicely? It must be all of the practice he's getting at school, and the other kids that show him how it's done. I smile at my boy, "I like that you are walking next to me, thank you." He gives me an odd look and we continue in to his appointment, right on schedule- 10 minutes early.

Our kitchen scissors disappeared. I may have put them up, that's never good, but anyway... My husband bought oranges when he went to the store this week. Alex spotted the bag and when he was unsuccessful in emptying the bag onto the floor, threw the bag at me to let me know he wanted one. Alex chokes on food that needs to be chewed so I usually separate the orange and use the scissors to cut the sections into bite sized pieces. With no scissors, that gets a lot more difficult but when Alex actually makes a request, I don't like to tell him no because he doesn't make requests. He doesn't communicate his needs or desires in any way, so we'll figure it out. I peel the orange and section it out. I hold the piece while he takes a bite. He's having a hard time biting the orange, he's smooshing it and has juice running down his face and front, and my hand and arm. We're both drenched. "You have to bite it, buddy." "With your teeth." "No, BITE it." "Come on, you had no trouble biting me last night!" As soon as I said the last one, he lets out a hoot of laughter. Looking at him with the orange still gripped in his mouth, juice running down his face and my hand while he laughs at a joke, I have to laugh along with him. This moment was beautiful.

I can't give Alex a bath. He takes a bath to play in the water with his toys, I let the water out and then open the curtain to shower him with the hand held shower head because he will splash me while laughing his ass off if I try to open the curtain before the water is gone. Last night, I was getting a little impatient with how slow the water seemed to be leaving the tub because I wanted to go to bed. The water was halfway out when I peeked behind the curtain and asked, "if I open the curtain, are you going to splash me?" *slight smile* *nod* *starts kicking the water* Ok, then. 1/4 of the water is left, "how about now? Can I open it now?" "no wan' to." *sigh* fine. There's less than an inch left by the time he lets me open the curtain to shower him. Getting him out and drying him off, the boy is chattering a mile a minute...
"Goodbye, goodbye. School bus."
"No, buddy. First goodnight goodnight, Then school bus."
"No wan' to. Goodbye goodbye. School bus."
"No, buddy. First goodnight goodnight, Then school bus."
This argument has been going every night for months. I'm loving it. This is the first year he's been interested in communicating regularly. This is the first year that he's really wanted to interact with me. Looking at how far he's come in the past few years, I'm amazed.

 These boys, oh, they had me so mad the other day. Last week was spring break and looking at the house, you could tell. I opened the dishwasher to see if they needed to be washed or put away... you would not believe the amount of food all over these dishes! Walter had been the one to load it so I yelled for Walter. "Boy, you are almost 14 years old, it's about damned time you learn to load a dishwasher." I'm standing there, talking him through each dish- rinsing them and putting them in the correct places when the Goofy Child gets his bossiness going, "Walter, when you get done with that, you need to take the trash out because the trash needs to be taken out." Honey, Walter just graduated to dishes, get your shoes on. Then it's Walter's turn to laugh at the Goofy One for making the wonderful decision to open his mouth while mom's PMSing. A week later, Goofy's still taking trash out, and Walter's still doing dishes. Watching the little one take a half filled trash bag that's half his size across the yard and put it in the trash bin is a good feeling. Watching clean dishes come out of the dishwasher is even better. Goofy takes pride in his new job and Walter is making sure he fully rinses his dish as soon as he uses it :)

Looking at this bunch, I'm not sure I can legitimately call them my legion of evil anymore. They're not hell bent on causing the destruction of the world or the collapse of society anymore. Might not be as entertaining, but I think this is change I can handle.

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