Apparently, we must have figured some things out at Goofy's meeting, because yesterday my e-mail was flooded with information.
I don't even know where to start with this child. This boy has issues. All I can say is at least he's fun. Over the years, it's been suggested a time or two.. *cough*or 20 ...that the Goofy Child's issues are parenting problems. Now, here's the thing, the boy definitely has parent parenting problems. I won't argue that, there is an awful lot of guess work and googling in my parenting strategies... but not everything is a parenting problem. Oh, he can't independently dress himself? maybe he likes you being there. Yeah, you don't know me very well. I'm a busy woman, you know. I have candy to crush and farm plots to harvest and Rancid Raccoon is not going to defeat himself, I don't have time to wait on kids hand and foot. I can promise you, there is no way in hell I'm doing anything I don't have to do.
So, the boy's working on a lot of things and I can't even pick one to focus on. What's the priority? What is he already getting "enough" help with? Should I focus on the troubles he has at home, self care, behavior, socialization, handwriting, reading...? Where do you start? I don't even know. We've been doing this and that for years- googling and guess work, remember? but now that I am finally getting real information from real professionals, I don't know which one to start with. Plural, of course, but if there is one thing Alex's school taught me, it's this- prioritize and focus on the few. Alex has fewer goals than he's ever had, but he's making more progress than he ever has. Just because something is not listed as a goal does not mean it can't be worked on or isn't being worked on. I guess it's easier with Alex because Alex already has an IEP I can follow.
So, I'm stuck. Where do you go when you are both procrastinating and looking for inspiration? Facebook, of course. Facebook has everything. I love my newsfeed. and that's where I saw it, "His report card came home today. Yeah. I will just sit here and beat myself up for being a crappy parent now." *fist bump* hell, yeah. Right there with you, sister. I saw someone else respond, "Look in the mirror, see that woman who has fought for her son every way and every day? no fails here" true enough, I guess. Reading on, they start talking about setting realistic and attainable goals. Oh, shit, I say to myself, They're supposed to reach the goals!? Alex is in 6th grade and I think the only goal he has ever met was "move limbs to aide in dressing." and here I was celebrating the fact that his report cards now say "progress." Hm, ok. so, I need to set attainable goals for the Goofy One. Alright. Yeah, I'm still stuck. SMART goals. Specific. Measurable. Attainable. Realistic/Relevant. Time limited. Ok, I got that, but where to start...? You make big goals based on present levels, make small goals to get to the big goals. Present levels are based on the areas you're looking at. Fuck. right back where we started.
At least this year is going to go on forever, right? Alex has the perfect teacher, Goofy has the perfect teacher, Walter has several teachers I adore... it's a good year. We'll just stay here. procrastinating. forever.
Thing2 and Walter come in to burst that bubble. Walter wants me to approve his schedule for next year, Thing2 has yet another story about his principal- the principal who hates him and yells a lot. The principal that more than once I've thought of visiting but didn't want to step on my husband's toes since he's the one who deals with that school. and something tickles the back of my mind... Principals are trading places. the Senior Principal will be the Sophomore principal and the Freshman Principal for Walter's last name. No, God, you can't be serious, right? please tell me you're joking. God doesn't answer. I look at Walter, "That's not..." it is. And now, here I am hyperventilating over changing staff. In January. 7 months before it even happens. None of the second grade teachers filled out their profiles, and Alex's school doesn't even have profiles. Although a fun distraction, not helping me figure out what I'm doing with Goofy.
Well, we have 30 days before our next meeting, I might be able to get some ideas there and both the Area Coordinator and the counselor sent information on in-home therapy. The kind that teaches you how to parent or something. I'm seriously thinking about that one. They might be able to give me a direction to go in.
For this weekend, I'm taking some time off. My entire plan for these two days is to enjoy my kids.