Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Missing Information: Found. School Meetings.

Mondays. Did I say I loved Mondays? Well, that was stupid.

Yesterday, I can't say if it was good or bad. I don't know what it was. exhausting. Yes, that's it. Exhausting.

It started with the usual banishing of evil creatures from my house for the day and went on to more complicated matters like school meetings.

My husband got the meeting he was wanting with the  middle school, which I headed into annoyed for an entirely new matter. While the e-mails to me were nice and friendly, the  e-mails to my husband were snippy and dismissive. as if, because my concerns were addressed, his concerns were invalid. No. it doesn't work like that. Walter has TWO parents. Just because we aren't usually on the same page and operate on entirely different timeframes doesn't mean we aren't both very much involved.

It turns out, the assistant principal didn't have all of the information... and neither did I. Each one of us missing a vital fact that would have colored how we handled it. The assistant principal had never heard #1 or #2's names. and I, didn't know #3 was quite a bit smaller than Walter. I tried to talk to Walter after he got home but he asked me not to. He said, "Mom, please. don't. The look on your face killed me. It stayed with me all day, I couldn't stop thinking about it." I dropped it. Hopefully, he really understood the reason for the look on my face.

After a good long discussion, things are whatever and people are all friendly and my husband feels the need to apologize for e-mails. Uh-uh! Speak for yourself, man! My e-mail is just fine! I meant every word I said and would say it all again today. I also found out at that meeting that while my husband likes to try to censor my language, the counselor and the assistant principal have no problem what-so-ever with the word bullshit. and later, I found out that may have been because in an earlier meeting, Walter's friend's mom was dropping the f*bomb left and right. Wish my husband had been there for that one.

And then.... the Goofy child.

Going into this meeting, I'm so tired. I'm having a hard time focusing- I even kept forgetting I had a meeting. That's bad. but I got there. on time. I can't remember why I'm there or what I want and, believe it or not, at one point I forgot why I wanted an IEP. Seriously. I had to stop talking to think about it. That's really bad.  No worries, I eventually remembered. The IEP isn't about the accommodations, although he will have them, it's about addressing the need for the accommodations as well as getting SSD services like occupational therapy.

I did find out that they are following his 504, using every bit of it even though I don't see the evidence on his papers. She's using a laminated piece of paper to cover up the parts he isn't working on because the whole page is overwhelming. and she is using his timer, he just can't have it in his hand because it's too distracting. Group work is ok for now, they are all just starting to learn it and it's closely supervised. Math is his best subject, he's doing great in math. There are major concerns with writing and some concerns with reading.

Typical, typical, typical. *sigh* If it's all so effing typical, why does he qualify for supplemental reading services!? Oh, it's the lower end of typical. For now. Soon it won't be so typical. and since he's doing so great in math, it's not the ADHD.

So, we're going over my plan and we disagree (mildly) about the timeline (30-60-30 vs 30-60-45) and whether Auditory Processing Disorder falls under Specific Learning Disability (Specific learning disability means a disorder in one or more of the basic psychological processes involved in understanding or in using language, spoken or written, that may manifest itself in the imperfect ability to listen, think, speak, read, write, spell, or to do mathematical calculations) or Other Health Impairment (means having limited strength, vitality, or alertness, including a heightened alertness to environmental stimuli, that results in limited alertness with respect to the educational environment) and if there is a difference between last year's evaluation for autism and this year's evaluation for Specific Learning Disability so the school psychologist is called in to the meeting.

I don't understand the importance of having such small things 'cleared up', if it was about them really wanting the information or really hoping to prove me wrong on something but not only was I right, right, and right, and he said the same thing I told the principal the other day about the things I'm looking at being so very similar, and he said that Goofy is getting closer to not being developmentally typical.. I also got a new word- dysgraphia.

Why the hell not, right? I'll add it to my list.

1 comment:

  1. I have dysgraphia and so do all three of my kids. If you want resources let me know. I am sorry for all of this it sounds overwhelming and a lot to take in.

    It is good that they are recognizing that though I went a lifetime undiagnosed.