The second explosion was kind of simultaneous.... but I lost the picture. that's ok, I'll tell you about it. That effing dog ate my turtle food! Container and all! and a roll of paper towels, an Apple Jacks box (with the Apple Jacks), a kitchen spatula, Alex's toy... and destroyed a library book! and I'm still pissed that he tore up the trampoline net- after I spent a full day sowing the damned thing back together from the first time! Dog has got to go. ate my f*cking turtle food.
The third explosion started out with a plan, because when does it not? I was planning a BBQ and sending out invitations. I invited my brother and sister. I sent them a message, "Mother's Day BBQ. My house. BYOM. (Bring your own mom. See what I did there? I'm so f*cking clever.) Serious. Bring your mom." Well, that didn't happen. as if people can't change their schedules to fit my whims. I mean, come on, who *really* needs to work for a living? Whatever. and then I talked to my husband. I have a list, man. a LIST! I want Uncle and Aunt, Things1&2's mom, Alex's other parents, and that parasite T1 can't seem to shake.
He rewrites my guest list!!! Things1&2's mom and Alex's other parents don't need to come but we're keeping the Aunt and Uncle and the parasite. The hell we are! It's my party and I don't even like her! The only reason I was inviting her is so I could invite the others! You get what you want without whining, I get what I want without whining, we all have someone at the party we don't like and we're happy, right? I'm not going to be the only unhappy person at my own party!
The disagreement ended in curse words, a refusal to participate in a bullshit holiday, and screaming about another "woman's" (and I use the term loosely) poor choices... the words cunt, whore, POS, backstabbing, two-faced, suck-ass, and streetwalker were all used. and to make it all even better... 3 sets of neighbors heard every screamed word through the opened widows. Strike 2 against spring. and my husband is no longer talking to me.
The BBQ was cancelled.
Well, that went well.
Lets' try that again. Memorial Day weekend is coming... and I have a plan. :)