Thursday, January 31, 2013

The Adventures of Soup

Let me set the scene for you... the shenanigans have ended, the giggling from bedrooms has stopped, facebook has been logged out and computer shut down. I stole my pillow back from my husband and settled in for American Idol Auditions #5. All of a sudden, I'm hungry. I want something ... good. I go in search of good food and spot a can of tomato soup. Now, tomato soup is good. I gotta get me some of that.

I take the can out of the pantry and head for the stove. I set my can on the counter and take out the perfect pan. I open the left drawer and take out my favorite spoon. I look around in the left drawer and don't see the can opener. That's ok. I've been making kids do dishes at night and they never put anything where it belongs (and then they whine at me that there's no organizational system.)

I go over to the right hand drawer. No can opener. also not in drawer 3, 4, 5, or 6. Fine. Not in the dishwasher, the sink on any counters or the basket on the microwave. ok. think, woman. where did you last see it? think, think, think... aw, hell. It was in Alex's hand. Ok. Fine.

If you were Alex... (because all the best stories start like that) where would you put it? Not in the turtle tank. or the toilet. or the tub. where? where, where, where... aha! hm, not at the bottom of the stairs, in the couch, under the couch, behind the couch and nope, definitely not in the turtle tank. Ok. Fine.

I'll get the electric one. I look in the lower right cabinet, the lower left. The upper right, upper left, pantry, entry way closet, garage... "where in the world is the freaking can opener!?" I wonder out loud. "Mom, I think maybe you should eat something else. Like a cheese sandwich." "Dude. what are you even doing up?" "I'm hungry. I want a hotdog on bread with ketchup." Since I'm looking for food, I can't really argue with that. So the Goofy one fixes himself a hotdog on bread with ketchup and didn't even spill the ketchup. woot-woot.

Ok, so... focus, woman! Can opener. where would it be? Uhg. we gave it to Thing1 when he moved out. Fine. Where does Alex put things he's finished with? No, still not in the turtle tank. Well, maybe it wasn't Alex. Let's start from the top. "Mom, why don't you just eat something else?" *raised eyebrow*, "Goofy, why don't you just go to bed?" Goofy *shrugs* and goes on with his hotdog. on bread. with ketchup.

I go search bedrooms. Not in Goofy's room. I'm standing there, contemplating the risk of waking Alex up searching his room or trying to open the can without a can opener when out of the corner of my eye, I catch a flash of grey. *woot* found it! It's in my bedroom floor. *smirk*

I go wash the can opener and open my can of tomato soup and go to pour it into the perfect pan when I see... dirty specks. Who ever thought it was a good idea to have the kids do dishes!? Ok, fine, but who ever seconded the ridiculous plan!? Fine. I get a new pan and cook my soup and go to my bed with my comfy blankets (yes, plural) and my soft pillow to watch American Idol Auditions #5 when I find someone small in. my. spot! Scoot, Goof! I was here first!


11 comments:

  1. I have learned a lot about you from this post. If you're that determined when it's a can of tomato soup on the line, I'd love to see your work ethic when it's important.

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  2. Sometimes it's good to have multiples of everything when you have kids! I use to keep a back up for my back ups.

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    1. That would probably be a better idea than calling search and rescue ;)

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  3. LOVE tomato soups!!!! Do you add milk or water? Ritz or no Ritz? LOVE tomato soup!!!

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    1. I do tomato soup with milk and ritz!!

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    2. Milk, of course! I'll have to try the ritz!

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  4. tomato soup with milk, and goldfish crackers ;) glad u got your soup mama :)

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  5. I admire your tenacity and can-do attitude towards finding the can opener. I would've taken one look in the drawer and then stolen Goofy's hotdog so I could get back to watching Nicky Minaj's hair.

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    1. "Minaj"!!! THAT'S what he's been saying! Thank you :D

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