Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Illness pretty much ruins the SuperMom image.

Rough night last night. If you're on the page you know Alex has a pretty nasty virus that is causing some tummy issues. Throughout the night he's had several baths because I can't just flat out wipe him right now, it hurts, man! So, he's had several baths and applications of diaper rash ointment.

The first bath after bedtime I gave up and asked for help.
I said to my husband, "Please come help me with this."
He says, "help you with what? Just put the diaper rash ointment on him."
"*sigh*, just please, come help me. I just need you to stand there." For some reason Alex is good when someone else is watching, especially "Dad".
"This is ridiculous. Well, there's your problem. Just lay him down on the towel and put it on, you can't put it on when he's standing up."
"huh. That's brilliant! Why didn't *I* think of that!? I'll get *right* on it. Just stand there and look pretty for a minute."
I lay Alex back down on the towel, start to apply the ointment and get kicked in the shoulder. My husband decides it may be a good idea to hold one leg and coo at him to help him be calm while I very carefully spread the creamy paste all over the raw, red areas.

By 5am, if Alex started talking today, he'd be fluent in sailor. He's got diaper rash ointment all over him, I have diaper rash ointment all over me, neither one of us are happy about it. I drop the whole loving mama thing and simply direct him to his bed, he's happy to go. He knows I love him and he's beautiful and perfect and so damned sweet. I don't need to tell him every single flipping time I put his ass back in bed. He gets it.

7:30am, my husband is hating the snooze button.

7:55am, my husband is complaining that my 5 minutes has lasted hours now (he exaggerates. it was hour. singular.) and the Goofy child will miss his bus. I inform him that I *really* have 5 minutes this time. He harrumphs at me so I kick at the child at the end of the bed and tell him to go get dressed. Goofy swears he has 5 minutes. I agree.

 My husband tells me Walter isn't up yet. fine. I'll get him up in 5 minutes, after peeking at the clock I make that 3 minutes. I kick at the child and tell him to go get dressed. My husband wants to know if I laid his clothes out. No, but he knows where they are and today I don't care what he looks like. My husband gets up and I let out a stream of words designed to let him know how happy I am that he just guilted me into leaving the bed 2 minutes before my time was up. (he's not home because he's off, he's using a sick day.)

Sometime around 8:30, the Goofy one informs me that his intestines hurt. Great. that is awesome. What do I do now? I can't let him stay home for a belly ache with no other symptoms. But his brother is sick so that increases the chance that his belly really does ache. The clock is ticking and my coffee hasn't kicked in yet so I send him to his Dad who says he's fine. If we get a call, we'll go get him.

8:36am I grab my phone to check the time and teach my kids a few new words. I holler at Goofy that we have to go now. Like, right now. As we are rushing to cross the yard to the bus stop with his hat crooked, his coat tossed on and unbuttoned showing off his mismatched clothes and I'm wiping the peanut butter off of his face with my sleeve, his bus pulls up and he has to run to catch it. He sure is cute when he's in a hurry.

and now, I'm waiting for Alex to wake up so we can start round 3. aaaaaaand, the cat puked in the floor. because why not? Everyone else is doing it. I'll be SuperMom(ish)(enough) some other day, today I'm just going to be happy that I remembered to give the boys their ADHD meds ;)


  1. Sorry it's rough at the moment! Hope Alex feels better soon (and urgh, definitely hope nobody else has come down with it too!) Sending you hugs from a safe distance :)

  2. The funny thing is that I totally miss those days!! I must be sick in the head or something. : )

    At least I still have the cats puking all over the place.

  3. it's bad enough dealing with autism and adhd. when you add diahhrea it's a whole nother level.